Writers Jam

I have two that got away, funnily enough there were totally two different versions of me with these two

With one, I was soft and open, begging for love. With the other, I was guarded, careful not to lose myself. I’ve been both—too much and not enough.

One was crying through nights that he didn’t made plans or didn’t initiate, the other me was getting tired of all the love given, like I needed some space, to save some part of me that wasn’t his, just mine.

In both cases, I didn’t know what I wanted—or who I was. Still a big question mark, honestly. I guess I’ll have to figure it out with my therapist, haha.

Although with the second person, 

It’s the worst feeling—wanting to hold on to someone who gave you everything, even when you know it’s not love.

It’s like I finally HAD it and I was watching it slip away while I tried to hold on hard.

And all you can do is wonder if you will find someone that you will give your all to.

The one where you can be your true self with.

The one where we both grow individually and together in a way.